Why My First Response is Running, Err, Tactically Retreating

Am I a sheep, sheepdog, or wolf? The answer is none of the above. I carry a firearm and known how to defend myself so I don’t qualify as a sheep. I’m not an initiator of violence so I’m not a wolf. Nobody would qualify me as a sheepdog because when a bad situation arises my first response is to get the fuck away from that situation.

This puts me at odds with Tactical Tom. In their eyes I’m a coward who has failed to rise to the occasion and defend the sheeple of the world. But there’s a reason I prefer running away to fighting. As Tam points out, even if I somehow defy all odds and take down all of the evil terrorist gang members the situation isn’t resolved:

So, there our hero is, sitting in the mall, munching on a Chick-fil-A and reading Sheepdog Magazine Monthly when that event that he’s wargamed out in gun forum discussion boards for years finally happens! A bunch of guys yelling “Allahu akhbar!” come swarming out of the GAP, firing AK-47s from the hip and headed straight for the food court!


Using the tactics he learned at Rick Taylor‘s Advanced Tactical Combat Gunfighting Level II class, he assaults into the ambush…

…Only to be mowed down by the guys in blue who show up towards the tail end of the festivities.

I know tactical Tom is ready to engage any manner of hypothetical baddie and come out triumphantly. But he’s often spending too much time fantasizing about the hero’s treatment he plans to receive from the grateful sheeple he saved to consider that other sheepdogs were called to the scene and aren’t privy to the details of what transpired. All they know is that a bunch of people called and were in a panic because men with guns were shooting the area up. They are going in expecting to be shot at and aren’t going to spend a great deal of time on target identification. If they see somebody with a gun they’re likely going to assume that that person is a bad guy and take him down. So even if you managed to take down the entire Taliban you’re not home free.

Violent situations are usually clusterfucks and anybody who arrives after the situation is already underway won’t be able to make heads or tails of what is transpiring. That being the case it’s always best to be somewhere else. If bullets start flying around me I’m going to look for an escape. Only if one is unavailable* will I begrudgingly move to the second plan of utilizing my own capacity for violence. After all, bullets are hazardous to my health whether they’re being fired by terrorist gang bangers or guys with badges.

*Before some self-proclaimed guarding of the universe sheepdog comes in and makes a quip about my willingness to abandon somebody I love please note that availability relies on both existence and condition. If the escape exists and I can make use of it in a way that also saves my loved ones I consider it available. Otherwise I consider it unavailable.