Fellow Minnesotans, I’m proud to announced that after a great deal of political begging, kowtowing, and cock sucking we’re going to be granted the privilege of buying alcohol on Sundays:
The legislation allowing Sunday sales passed the state Senate on Monday, after sailing through the state House by a wide margin last week.
Senators and representatives must still iron out minor differences between the two versions of the bill — one version would allow sales to begin on Sundays at 10 a.m., while the other would allow sales to start at 11 a.m.
But once those disputes are ironed out in a conference committee, the bill is all but certain to become law. Gov. Mark Dayton (D) has said he will not veto the bill.
And it only took 159 years!
This year marked the first time since Minnesota became a state, in 1858, that a Sunday sales law even passed one of the two legislative chambers.
See? The political process works! After more than a century and a half of begging their political masters, Minnesotans have finally carved out a tiny bit more freedom for themselves! At this rate people will be able to buy a car on Sunday by 2176!