Settling the Vaccine Debate

I’m not sure what caused it but people have really lost their shit over vaccines in the last week. A huge percentage of my Facebook feed consists of people arguing about whether or not vaccines have helped reduce and sometimes eliminate many terrible diseases or if they’re going to kill us all. The side arguing in favor of vaccines point to a ton of scientific research and data collected about diseases outbreaks and the other side claims that all of the diseases supposedly wiped out by vaccines were in remission before the vaccines were released. It’s an incredibly heated debate with no end in sight. Until now! I’m happy to report that we can finally put the vaccine debate to bed. After all of this angry screaming we can say, one and for all, who is right:

For all of the medieval practices that ISIS imposes on the Syrians and Iraqis living under its rule, there is one area where the terrorist group has so far been tolerant: vaccines.

“An unexpected success of the polio immunization campaigns in Syria and Iraq has been the access granted to vaccinators in territory controlled by the militant group calling itself the Islamic State,” according to the Integrated Regional Information Networks (IRIN), a humanitarian news service formerly part of the UN.

There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. The Islamic State supports vaccines so we now know that vaccines are Sharia law and therefore a ploy to rid the world of Christians, Jews, and women. If you support vaccines you’re supporting terrorism!

Now that that’s settled we can return to arguing about much more important things such as the dangers of Wi-Fi and the secret Illuminati messages in every Katy Perry video.

One thought on “Settling the Vaccine Debate”

  1. People have lost their shit because of the minor measles outbreak at Disneyland, which has made the pro-forced vaccine media people froth at the mouth. I think they were mad that they had to actually admit that this years flu vaccine is for a completely different strain and useless, which has cut into their normal profits.

    I would never turn down a rabies or tetanus if I ever needed them.

    However, I really don’t trust the state to provide safe or effective anything, let alone vaccines. Pharmaceutical companies have immunity and if you try and sue for any damages you have to go through a separate court system, which I am sure is very fair.

    But, I am glad that ISIS has settled the debate once and for all. Figuring things out for yourself is just so hard…

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