How Not to Get Killed By a Cop

So many people have been getting killed by police that I’ve been trying to figure out the best way to survive an encounter with one of those costume clad thugs with a shiny liability shield. I searched through several police department websites seeing if they had any tips or tricks but came up empty handed. It was then that I decided to consult with experts on modern policing, neocons and other petty authoritarians.

After some discussions I finally learned the trick to avoid getting killed by a cop and it’s really simple. If you encounter a cop you just need to be a good little slave, kowtow to the costume clad master, and beg the courts for freedom after you’ve had the shit kicked out of you because the cop didn’t want you to beat the ride even if you could beat the charge.

By simply allowing the petty man with a badge to scream at you, rough you up, and kill your family pets you can survive! At least some of the times. Really it’s up to the office and their decision will likely depend on whether or not they had the opportunity to beat somebody up recently or not.