Tag: Random Funny Shit

Apparently Capitalism Killed Life on Mars

Hugo Chavez is one of my favorite punching bags. First he claims that the earthquake in Haiti was caused by the United State’s super top secret earthquake machine and now he’s claiming capitalism is likely what killed all life on Mars:

“I have always said, heard, that it would not be strange that there had been civilization on Mars, but maybe capitalism arrived there, imperialism arrived and finished off the planet,” Chavez said in speech to mark World Water Day.

Chavez, who also holds capitalism responsible for many of the world’s problems, warned that water supplies on Earth were drying up.

Well Mr. Chavez I’d say it’s far more probably that socialism arrived as it has a nasty habit of leading to horrible loss of life as exemplified by the Soviet Union’s attempt at collectivization and China’s Great Leap Forward. It is the red planet after all.

America, Fuck Yeah

I don’t think it’s possible for this company to stick the word “America” into their motto any more times and have it make grammatical sense:

Made In America By Americans That Appreciate America And The US Constitution!!!

That’s a whole lot of America right there… and exclamation points. But hey if you’re looking for remanufactured ammunition and you love America these may be the people for you to do business with.

An Ironic Turn of Events

A scumbag broke into somebody’s home then called 911 because he feared the homeowner had a gun:

Chapek locked himself in the bathroom and made an emergency call, police said. He said he had broken into the house, the owner had come home, and that he was concerned the owner might have a gun.

That just puts a smile on my face. One benefit of an armed society as we have in America is the fact you can’t know whether or not somebody has a gun. If the thug in this story knew for sure the homeowner was unarmed he may have decided to attack him instead of barricading himself in a bathroom and calling 911. I’m also impressed with the following fact:

Police with dogs took Chapek, 24, into custody “without incident,” they said. He was booked for criminal trespass.

They did not say if the homeowner did in fact have a gun.

The police didn’t report if the homeowner had a gun. The problem with reporting if the homeowner had a gun is the fact that, if identified, the homeowner could become a target for thiefs wanting to steal guns.

Conflict of Interest

I have a slight moral conflict here as I oppose the use of violence outside of self-defense but on the other hand these cyclists had it coming:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9oOL6fMvhww]

A hat tip to Gun Free Zone for finding this first.

Also for those who don’t understand sarcasm I have no moral conflict, what the driver in the Volkswagen did was wrong. I’m also not going to lie, I laughed hard when I watched this.