Tag: Random Funny Shit

Poroposed Assembler Opcodes

Obviously this is only going to apply to the truly geeky watching this and most of those people have already seen this but it’s still funny. Some of the opcodes I really like and would find useful:

BAC – BRANCH TO ALPHA CENTAURI

You never know when you’ll have to branch to data on Alpha Centauri. Heck I’d use this all the time.

CH – CREATE HAVOC

Regardless of what some people believe this instruction doesn’t actually exist in your computer.

CMD – COMPARE MEANINGLESS DATA

Hey look it’s Al Gore’s opcode!

DBZ – DIVIDE BY ZERO

This would solve a lot of crashes created by new programmers.

ECO – ELECTROCUTE COMPUTER OPERATOR

Oh if only I had this instruction available when people called me for computer help.

HCF – HALT AND CATCH FIRE

Good instruction for the truly paranoid out there.

MWAG – MAKE WILD-ASSED GUESS

Al Gore’s other beloved instruction.

UP – UNDERSTAND PROGRAM

If only that existed.

For those of you who aren’t computer geeks realize this is the type of humor that some of use laugh at. Yet I know it’s sad.

Funny Search Terms

One nice thing about WordPress is it will list different search terms people used to navigate to your site. I must admit I do find some humorous items in that list such as this one:

.308 round piercing skull range

I’m very curious to know the story behind that search term.

Vision, This Man Had It

When it comes to the technology field we get some great predictions and quotations. For instance take this article written in 1995 for Newsweek:

After two decades online, I’m perplexed. It’s not that I haven’t had a gas of a good time on the Internet. I’ve met great people and even caught a hacker or two. But today, I’m uneasy about this most trendy and oversold community. Visionaries see a future of telecommuting workers, interactive libraries and multimedia classrooms. They speak of electronic town meetings and virtual communities. Commerce and business will shift from offices and malls to networks and modems. And the freedom of digital networks will make government more democratic.

Baloney. Do our computer pundits lack all common sense? The truth in no online database will replace your daily newspaper, no CD-ROM can take the place of a competent teacher and no computer network will change the way government works.

That’s what I call a visionary! Oh and:

Then there’s cyberbusiness. We’re promised instant catalog shopping—just point and click for great deals. We’ll order airline tickets over the network, make restaurant reservations and negotiate sales contracts. Stores will become obselete. So how come my local mall does more business in an afternoon than the entire Internet handles in a month? Even if there were a trustworthy way to send money over the Internet—which there isn’t—the network is missing a most essential ingredient of capitalism: salespeople.

Yeah there’s now way that online shopping thing could catch on. Never!

Truth About Guns Mentioned in Latest JPFO Alert

Well guys it appears as though my podcast has hit the big time. I’ve been mentioned in the latest Jews for the Preservation of Firearm Ownership e-mail alert. Of course the mention was entirely inadvertent. Here is an exert from the alert:

ALERT FROM JEWS FOR THE PRESERVATION OF FIREARMS OWNERSHIP
America’s Aggressive Civil Rights Organization

March 5th 2010

JPFO ALERT: LAMPOON A LEFTIST

We recently received an article from -The truthaboutguns.com –
http://thetruthaboutguns.com/2010/03/robert-farago/jewish-gun-ownership-up/

It takes to task a sloppy and incomplete article by a leftist
Israeli newspaper about gun ownership.

Share it with an anti-gunner this weekend. You will be glad you
did.

So an accidental space between “The” and “truthaboutguns.com” nabbed me some free publicity. And I did check to ensure I had my domain before the other site and it appears as though The Truth About Guns started in February of 2010 while I started in 2009 so I have precedence. Does that matter at all? Not in the slightest to me but it’s always nice to be in a position where I don’t have to worry about changing my URL due to possible legal issues.

Either way I just thought that this was funny and I’d share it.

What $18 Million of Your Tax Money Gets You

This one comes to you courtesy of care of No Agenda. I’m sure everybody has heard of the government’s website for “tracking money” use in the “recovery effort.” If you haven’t you should have since $18 million of your tax money went to make it. Well either way part of the mandate for the site was that it needed to be accessible by the blind. That brings us to the complain form.

In order to submit a complaint you need to enter a capta. This is pretty standard and is mostly used to prevent spam bots from posting on a web site. Well blind people can’t use them as they can’t see the words so there is often an audio version of the capta for accessibility reasons. Click on the audio version link in the capta box on recovery.gov. Now try to decipher what is being said in those audio clips. Do you think you could understand what is being said and type it all into the box accurately? Didn’t think so.

Technically it’s recapta that is the problem here as recovery.gov is using that. But for $18 million you would think they could have come up with their own spam control system that blind people could use. Seriously funny and sad at the same time.

Bad Ass

Another article I found via The Firearm Blog. This story is about a man’s man who is obviously a bad ass and a good father:

“I shot him in the nuts with bird-shot because he was beating my daughter,” Kelly said.

That line alone allows me to overlook the fact the man was using a Taurus Judge. Seriously that one sentence extrudes bad ass. Anyways the daughter isn’t happy but you know what? I’m giving the father the benefit of the doubt since I wouldn’t react well to somebody beating my daughter (If I had one).

Best Meme Ever

There is a new gun blogger meme started by none other than Uncle:

The commercial should have ended with a guy in a big ass Ford Earthfuckertm that gets 5 miles per gallon with seats made from baby seals blowing past the roadblock billowing smoke. And, for effect, the driver flips them off. I’d buy that car. Not this little compliant pansy car. You appeal to Americans in an ad by showing rebellion and general orneriness. Not passiveness, compliance, or sheepishness.

Sadly I drive a Ford Ranger which hardly comes close to being an Earthfucker but I plan on moving up some day. It appears as though Random Nuclear Strikes has found somebody who does own an Earthfucker though.