The Kindle Violates Civil Rights

I must write too much about the Kindle because every possible story involving my favorite little device gets e-mailed to me en masse. No I’m not complaining, let me thank those of you who e-mail this stuff because it’s always good. But this story boarders on stupid as shit.

Apparently in lieu of having real things to do the Justice Department threatened universities with lawsuits for taking part in the trials to see if Kindles would be a good replacement for text books. Their reasoning? Because the Kindle violates the civil rights of the blind.

It seemed like a promising idea until the universities got a letter from the Justice Department’s Civil Rights Division, now under an aggressive new chief, Thomas Perez, telling them they were under investigation for possible violations of the Americans With Disabilities Act.

From its introduction in 2007, the Kindle has drawn criticism from the National Federation of the Blind and other activist groups. While the Kindle’s text-to-speech feature could read a book aloud, its menu functions required sight to operate. “If you could get a sighted person to fire up the device and start reading the book to you, that’s fine,” says Chris Danielsen, a spokesman for the federation. “But other than that, there was really no way to use it.”

Emphasis mine. Why do I emphasis that? Because the Kindle has a text-to-speech feature while real books fucking don’t! OK the menus are not text-to-speech but it could be added in trivially and honestly a blind person could memorize the series of clicks and movements to activate the features. Even though the feature isn’t perfect (or even close) it’s still far better than regular fucking books which the universities were looking to replace.

Instead of looking to lawsuits maybe those idiots should have contacted Amazon and offered to help improve the text-to-speech functionality. Oh and this makes sense:

The Civil Rights Division informed the schools they were under investigation. In subsequent talks, the Justice Department demanded the universities stop distributing the Kindle; if blind students couldn’t use the device, then nobody could. The Federation made the same demand in a separate lawsuit against Arizona State.

So if blind people can’t use books than nobody can? That should save students buckets of money right there! Maybe this is the Obama administration’s solution to lower the cost of education. As usual the government isn’t actually representing the people they claim to be:

It’s an approach that bothers some civil rights experts. “As a blind person, I would never want to be associated with any movement that punished sighted students, particularly for nothing they had ever done,” says Russell Redenbaugh, a California investor who lost his sight in a childhood accident and later served for 15 years on the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights. “It’s a gross injustice to disadvantage one group, and it’s bad policy that breeds resentment, not compassion.”

That’s right actual blind people don’t want this, the government pretending to represent them does. Oh and get this:

One obvious solution to the problem, of course, was to fix the Kindle. Early on, Amazon told federation officials it would apply text-to-speech technology to the Kindle’s menu and function keys. And sure enough, last week the company announced a new generation of Kindles that are fully accessible to the blind. While the Justice Department was making demands, and Perez was making speeches, the market was working.

Wow who would have thought that would happen? Anybody? It’s good to see all of your hands are up. You don’t need to pull out a lawsuit when the company is more than happen to correct the problem for its potential customers.

One of the major advantages to e-book readers over regular books is they can be made accessible to people with disabilities. You can never made a real book read to you but you can make an electronic device read text to you.

Wait, Illegal Whats…

Illegal pools… yeah. Apparently the town of Riverhead New York is using Google Earth to track down unlicensed pools. Since when did pools need to be licensed to be legal? Oh right because it’s for the children:

Riverhead’s chief building inspector Leroy Barnes Jr. said the unpermitted pools were a safety concern. He said that without the required inspections there was no way to know whether the pools’ plumbing, electrical work and fencing met state and local regulations.

“Pool safety has always been my concern,” Barnes said.

Of course pool safety is his concern it certainly isn’t money because certainly there is no money to be made from unlicensed pools… oh wait:

Violators were told to get the permits or face hefty fines. So far about $75,000 in fees has been collected.

Yeah pool safety my ass. I think it’s time to start putting up camouflage netting over our properties to avoid satellite pictures.

Your Government is Hard at Work

One thing we have to say about our federal government is that they certainly are hard working blokes. Take for instance the FBI. In essence they are a federal police force tasked with all sorts of jobs including granting government protection to exercise your second amendment rights in the form of NICS checks, enforcing interstate crimes, and of course spending your tax money trying to get Wikipedia to remove the FBI logo from the FBI article. Apparently they are using the following law:

18 U.S.C. 701 prohibits the manufacture, sale, or possession of any badge, identification card, or other insignia, of the design prescribed by the head of any department or agency of the United States for use by any officer or employee of that agency.

Funny because, as government employees, the FBI works for me. Combined with the fact that my tax money pays for their existence I’m entitled to reproduce the logo which I own since I paid for it. What law is does that fall under? Christopher Burg Fuckin’ Said So Law. Yeah it’s really obscure, good luck finding it.

Wikileaks Post Afghan War Records

Well it looks like Wikileaks is in the news again. This time they have released 91,000 reports from Afghanistan which they claim to be about lethal actions taking in that region. I’m sure it’s an interesting read and they have posted a downloadable version of the reports. I’d say get them while they’re hot in case they end up going away.

A Ban by Any Other Name

McDonald vs. Chicago struck down the unconstitutional firearm ban in that forsaken city. Now that they’re little ban has been struck down the officials who run that prison city are looking at ways of banning firearms without actually banning them.

As Snowflakes in Hell points out they’re doing it using the same method they used to ban them in the first place, the city gun registration system.

In order to obtain a permit to purchase a firearm you must fill out five pages of unintelligible paperwork, have vision good enough to obtain a driver’s license (sorry those of you who are blind or otherwise have poor vision you don’t have any rights), show up between the hours of 8:30 and 15:30, and pay a $100 fee.

Yup it’s so easy! Well so long as you can fill out paperwork, have good eye vision, don’t have a day job, and have enough money! Obviously those who work during the day, have less than ideal vision, and the poor need not apply. Likewise if you are in any of the three mentioned categories of people please go kill yourself now as you have no right to self-defense should an attack chose to kill you later. You’ll be saving yourself, the attacker, and the police a lot of time.

Also as a person with horrible vision without my glasses I can tell you that you can see an attacker just fine unless you’re practically blind. Without my glasses I can’t read anything on my laptop screen when the laptop is on my lap with my right eye. With my left eye I can’t read the title of any book on my bookshelf which is no more than 10 feet away. Even with my horrible vision I can see people well enough to shoot them at self-defense ranges if they are attacking me.

Needless to say I know what it’s like having bad vision. So even if you’re vision isn’t correctable to a point you can drive there is absolutely no reason you shouldn’t be able to own a firearm.

Hell I’ll Do That for Free

Random Nuclear Strikes has another post showing how incompetence of our government when it comes to money management. It seems our government paid $92.86 to destroy a single firearm. The kick in the teeth is the fact that they paid to have 1.4 million firearms destroyed.

I have a proposition for our government. Should you come across another 1.4 million guns you no longer want (or more, or less) I’m offering my services to take them off of your hand for free. That’s right instead of having to waste $92.86 dollars per gun to dispose of them you can give me the firearms at no cost to you. It’s simple, it’s easy, and best of all it’s free! I’ll also ensure the firearms I do not want find good homes (don’t worry I’ll ensure background checks are completed and everything). Yup that’s right I’m going to be green on this and recycle those arms that I do not want.

So donate today to Christopher Burg’s Home for Wayward Guns.

That’s Quite a List

Here’s something funny found via Say Uncle. The Chicago Police Department has made a list of “unsafe” firearms [PDF] that can not be registered in the city of Chicago. It’s pretty long but alas with few exceptions (Smith and Wesson for instance) the list is of manufacturers not firearms.

There are some real WTFs on that list. For instance the Sig Sauer Mosquito is on the list because as we all know the .22LR is one bad ass mother fucker.

Seriously that is a city that just tries too hard at being complete ass hats.

Don’t Bother Calling the Police

Us gun bloggers have said it again and again but I’ll say it again; police are under no legal obligation to protect you. In fact according to Dvorak Uncensored the Oakdale Police Department has made a list of crimes they will no longer respond to should planned layoffs occur. I might add this isn’t even a short list:

  • burglary
  • theft
  • embezzlement
  • grand theft
  • grand theft:dog
  • identity theft
  • false information to peace officer
  • required to register as sex or arson offender
  • dump waste or offensive matter
  • discard appliance with lock
  • loud music
  • possess forged notes
  • pass fictitious check
  • obtain money by false voucher
  • fraudulent use of access cards
  • stolen license plate
  • embezzlement by an employee (over $ 400)
  • extortion
  • attempted extortion
  • false personification of other
  • injure telephone/ power line
  • interfere with power line
  • unauthorized cable tv connection
  • vandalism
  • administer/expose poison to another’s

Oh and this golden:

Chief Anthony Batts listed exactly 44 situations that his officers will no longer respond to and they include grand theft, burglary, car wrecks, identity theft and vandalism. He says if you live and Oakland and one of the above happens to you, you need to let police know on-line.

So if you get into a car wreck you better hope your phone has a data plan because you need to e-mail that situation.

This is a rather dirty thing by Mr. Batts to say. Why? Because it’s an underhanded threat. He’s pretty much saying give his department money or they’ll stop protecting you. This is the exact same scheme used by the mob (say you have a nice store there, it would be a shame if anything were to happen to it). Seriously it’s just dirty. I understand without the police officers who will be laid off the Oakdale Police Department will be unable to do as much as they currently do but to outright phrase it and give a list of things the department will no longer respond to is just plain fear mongering.

And This is Who My State Elected People

I haven’t said much about the Kagen hearings because there really isn’t much I can say that hasn’t been said by somebody else already. Also I know she’ll get the confirmation regardless so I’ve decided to spend my time elsewhere. But I must say this is the kind of fuck up the majority of people in this state voted for when they filled in the little circle next to Klobuchar:

How crucial is the “Twilight” phenomenon to the cultural fabric of America? Enough that one’s opinion on it is apparently worth knowing before determining whether she should sit on the highest court in the land.

During her Supreme Court confirmation hearing on Wednesday, Solicitor General Elena Kagan was jokingly asked by Sen. Amy Klobuchar, Democrat of Minnesota, for her thoughts on a particularly pressing issue.

Yes senator Klobuchar wasted her time on the floor asking about fucking Twilight instead of say… oh I don’t know something on consequence.

To everybody outside of Minnesota let me state that I’m very sorry for what a majority of my fellow Minnesotans have done. I promise the rest of us will work hard to correct this problem. Also thanks goes to Random Nuclear Strikes for my daily depression. But also another hat tip goes to him for the best response ever on the subject at hand.

Here’s Your Definition of Irony for Today

Say Uncle provided today’s definition of irony. Apparently the IRS failed their recent government audit:

A new report from the Government Accountability Office inspected the tax agency’s financial statements from the 2009 fiscal year with the exacting thoroughness of, well, of an IRS auditor, and found a few billion-dollar errors.

But hey it’s only a few billion-dollar errors. It’s not like that’s real money or anything. So I wonder if the Government Accountability Office gets to make the IRS’s life Hell on Earth for the next decade.